Grief in the Body: Where Sorrow Lives When Words Fall Short

When we think of grief, we often think of tears. Of memories. Of aching hearts. But what we often forget is that grief also lives in the body.

You may not always feel sad in the traditional sense, but your body remembers. Your chest might feel heavy, your stomach unsettled. Sleep might come in bursts—or not at all. You may feel chronically exhausted, tense, or disconnected. These aren’t random symptoms. They’re part of your grief.

The Body as a Container for Loss

Our bodies are not separate from our emotions. They hold what we cannot say. They remember the moment we got the phone call. The way we tensed when we packed their things. The exhaustion of pretending we were okay.

Grief can show up physically as:

Tightness in the chest
Fatigue and low energy
Stomachaches, nausea, or appetite changes
Muscle tension or body aches
Difficulty sleeping or oversleeping
Brain fog or forgetfulness
Shallow breathing or sighing often
Numbness or disconnection from the body

For some, grief looks like a racing heart and panic attacks. For others, it’s the ache of a back that won’t stop hurting or the lump in the throat that never goes away. There is no single way grief shows up in the body—but it always does.

Why Does Grief Get Stored in the Body?

Because loss is trauma - Whether expected or sudden, loss is a rupture. It shatters our sense of safety, order, and identity. And the body, always on alert for danger, may respond with fight, flight, freeze—or collapse.
Because language can’t always hold our pain - When our minds can’t process everything at once, our bodies carry the load. Somatic grief (grief experienced through the body) often emerges when we haven’t had space or support to fully express or integrate what’s happened.
Because we’re often forced to keep going- Many people aren’t given time to grieve. They go back to work. They take care of others. They move through the motions. And grief, not given space to move through, gets stuck.

Listening to What Your Body Is Saying

Grief in the body isn’t something to be fixed or pushed away—it’s something to be acknowledged. It’s your body’s way of mourning, of releasing, of surviving. If you’re not sleeping, if your appetite is gone, if your body feels foreign—it doesn’t mean you’re broken. It means you’re grieving.

Some questions to gently explore:

Where in your body are you feeling heaviness right now?
Are there sensations that come up when you think about your loss?
When do you feel most disconnected from your body?
When do you feel a flicker of presence, even for a moment?

Ways to Tend to the Body in Grief

Gentle movement Walking, stretching, or yoga can help move some of the grief through your body without forcing anything. You don’t have to “work out”—you just have to move gently, with kindness.
Breathwork - When we’re grieving, we often forget to breathe deeply. Pausing to inhale and exhale slowly can help the nervous system settle. Even one mindful breath is a gift.
Rest - Grief is exhausting. Let yourself rest without guilt. Let your body slow down. You’re doing deep emotional labour every single day.
Soothing rituals - Baths, warm showers, herbal tea, a soft blanket—these are not trivial comforts. They are signals to the body that it’s safe, that it’s cared for.
Body-based therapy - Somatic therapy, EMDR, massage therapy, or craniosacral therapy can help release trauma and grief held in the body. If you’re feeling stuck, this might be something to explore.

Your Body Isn’t Betraying You—It’s Trying to Help You Grieve

Sometimes people feel frustrated with their bodies after loss. “Why am I always tired?” “Why do I feel numb?” But grief isn’t just an emotion—it’s a full-body experience. Your body is holding you in your grief, in the only way it knows how.

This doesn’t mean you have to suffer in silence. But it does mean you can offer yourself some compassion. Instead of pushing through or judging your symptoms, what if you asked your body: What do you need right now?

It might not answer in words. But it will tell you.

Grishma Dahal is a Registered Psychotherapist at Catharsis Psychology and Psychotherapy.